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We resisted it before Christmas, but since this whole story is circulating again, we've bitten the bullet and done a little skit parodying a recent furore in UK media, around an inflammatory newspaper column written for The Sun by British commentator and provocateur Jeremy Clarkson (who once hosted a car show called Top Gear but lately has hosted other programmes, and become a farmer). You can find the full details about him and his comments here: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainm.... Since the whole original Clarkson piece was based around a dream, we've chosen of course the iconic "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat" by Lord Andrew Lloyd Webber and Sir Tim Rice. The musical, still going strong, is based on the (quite dislikeable) character of Joseph from the Book of Genesis, and was the first of their incredible list of collaborations to be performed. Overambitiously, we've given a twist to three songs: the Prologue, Any Dream Will Do, and Joseph's Dream (all first performed in 1968), and we decided to try to do it all in one take, as we have a new audio interface that can process six XLR mics, thanks to the generosity of our Patreons! For the more opaque references: Meghan Markle is an American woman married to this chap called Prince Harry from Britain. Game of Thrones is a TV series that had an infamous scene modelled on a ritualised medieval humiliation. Andrew Tate is a misogynist. Nicola Sturgeon is the First Minister of Scotland, and Rose West a notorious serial killer - both of whom Clarkson referenced in his (now retracted) column. Avian flu's something that Clarkson's written about in the past. ________________ Thanks as ever to the people who support our musical antics through Patreon (where you can see extras like out-takes and podcasts): / marshfamilysongs Do join us there, or just leave a tip at our tip jar at: https://paypal.me/marshfamilysongs. ________________ Lyrics: PARODY PROLOGUE Some folks dream of the wonders they'll do Before their time on this planet is through Some just don’t recount reveries They hide from sight all their weird fantasies Now we don't say who is wrong, who is right But if by chance you are dreaming one night And all you dream is abusive and cruel It’s probably best not to publish, you tool We all dream a lot - some are hateful, some are not But if you think it, want it, dream it, then it's real You are what you feel But all that we say can be told another way In the hubris of a farmer who was rude Hope we don’t get sued! PARODY ANY DREAM WILL DO “I closed my eyes, NICOLA STURGEON That odious person popped into view I thought “I hate” some women deeply But who completely? Any dream will do" “I made some notes, about my feelings They’d be appealing, to old men I knew” He chose Rose West, for his painstaking Excoriating. Any dream would do “Perhaps THE SUN will let me write A column full of dynamite The hours faded into darkness I watched Game of Thrones” Maybe he’d wake up in the morning The light of dawn bringing a better mood He’d look and find much woman hating Lots of Andrew Tate-ing And he’d start anew But not Clarkson, who loves a fight "The filth I wrote I sent that night” The edit process pretty feckless No one changed the tone! Maybe he’ll learn one day that printing Everything he’s thinking, isn’t such a coup The Top Gear guy who loves berating Now finds his ratings Bad as Avian Flu PARODY JOSEPH'S DREAMS Clarkson’s prose was always vulgar But what makes us mad Are the things that Clarkson tells us of the Dreams he claims he had “I dreamed that in the streets one day, paraded and maligned Walked a naked woman, wedded to the royal line” His dream lacked creativity - it came from Game of Thrones He hoped to make some headlines with his boorish overtones This is not the kind of thing The public likes to hear It seems to us that Clarkson and his Dreams should disappear “I dreamed if I apologised, THE SUN might let it lie” Bowing like a peasant - he would wring his hands and sigh “Could it be that I was wrong to say the things I write? Attention seeking’s difficult - it needs a shower of shite The dreams of Clarkson’s column aren't The wrecking ball he thought It’s not as if we’ve all been starved Of royal new reports Not only is he tactless but He's also rather dim For ITV and Amazon Will soon get rid of him The dreams, of course, were never true That is, we think were never true That is, we hope were never true What if they normalise wrongs? What if they string folk along? The column’s verbal diarrhoea The tone despicable But rather let the bigot shout Than censoring us all In fact you can find other dreams (When tabloids stoop too low) But one thing we are sure about: the dreamer ought to know!