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Radiarc - All that I am

https://www.deviantart.com/imalou/art... https://radiarc.bandcamp.com/track/al... I was lost. The figure taunting, fighting...guiding me, if only I’d seen more clearly. Just as I felt I’d finally begun to piece everything together, she was just gone. Darkness. I remember darkness, but more akin to the eye of a storm encompassing existence, a steady calm with the promise of absolute wrath following. I walked onward, determined, but with every step came regret, until I fell to the ground instantly in the wake of a brilliant light. The figure appeared once more, illuminating the ground beneath as she approached me. I attempted to stand, but the strength I once counted on was gone. My failures, my flaws...I was nothing in the presence of everything. And yet, she spoke to me. "You can do it too, you know." In spite of everything, I rose. Slowly, but as her words echoed through my mind, I felt a fire burning within. The surrounding darkness faded to ash, save for that which remained in my hand, blazing. I looked to my other hand, and it burned as well, but with light, and the figure smiled. As my gaze met hers, everything was clear. All that I am, all that I've done...everything. I am all that I am, past and present, but it does not define me. "The darkness will never leave you," she told me as she turned to face the distance, but she looked back. "It's called experience." Like an angel, she flew, and so did I. Effortlessly, I soared with her, and she revealed the truth. The fields I once saw wave with colors and fractals now teemed with silhouettes, some familiar, others not. I witnessed far more than I can remember, but as we went on, comprehension extended beyond vision and became acceptance. She slowed her pace as we arrived at a rift, a grand abyss in a sea of memory. Her brilliance faded as she landed in the water, still and pure. There was nothing. I breathed in deeply and closed my eyes. I knew this was the beginning of the end, and the promise of absolute wrath would be fulfilled. There was no beauty. There was no liberty. There was only the familiar before me, and I was ready. _________ I'm sorry I've been gone for so long, but I wanted to return at the right time, and in the right way. I've finally moved, mostly stopped drinking, and my life is actually pretty wonderful. I haven't felt depressed in so long, and although things aren't necessarily going amazingly, but I don't feel like I'm living in hell anymore. Despite everything, I truly feel happy to be alive, and I'm honestly in awe every time I realize all of the times I wanted it to end. Emotion. I haven't struggled this hard to make something since Dream No More, but the second I heard the melody in my mind, I knew it had to be done. This took a few weeks to make, although most work was done in a couple days, I didn't want to compromise on anything; I wanted exactly what I felt, and nothing less. That isn't to say this doesn't have its shortcomings, but nothing I make will ever be perfect. This was intended as a sequel to Remember Me, and still acts as such, though much differently than I thought it would. TCB, a fellow pony musician, made a song titled "FOREVER IS NOTHING", and it completely changed my outlook on this portion of the story. It even inspired the beginning and end of this song, and for that, I'm very thankful. I just wanted something to resonate with, as I always do, and I'm happy to have found it again. On the technical side, though, this song almost didn't happen. I've been operating on 32GB of RAM for a while, and it's worked out well, but I'm finally starting to push this computer to its limits again. I'm independently saving up for more RAM with higher clock speeds and likely a motherboard and processor later on down the line, but any money I receive from music is going directly into upgrading the computer. I'm probably going to get rid of patreon soon because I'd rather feel complete freedom in uploading as opposed to being soft-pinned to a monthly deadline, but I've written far too much already. It's 4 in the morning at the time of writing this, so I suppose I'll have to amend this sometime. Until then, thank you for listening to me. It's truly been an adventure. For the rest of my work: https://radiarc.bandcamp.com/ And, if you're feeling generous: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/radiarc