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Free Black Midi Zine: https://griffinmace.substack.com/ Read my review for the week of Greep shows (Sept 2024) and enter a giveaway: https://griffinmace.substack.com/p/gr... Lyrics: When the smoke clears, what's left? Goodbye, goodbye You drop a kid in gasoline And give him a lit match And slap him on the ass When he lights himself aflame Like the man who pays his wife Two hundred pounds to have sex Because it's the only way he can come Like the girl, born a princess Too early or too late Who waits and waits and knows she'll never be queen What's left? The senile cat's incessant meow The children's favouritе canned cow The soundtrack of an unkept housе The soundtrack of an abandoned spouse What's left? The whirring cogs of futile despair The anguish of unanswered prayers The writhing mass of moaning torment What's left? You lure a fly to a blazing lamp Shut the lid tight And watch it dance about 'Til it dies Like Sirin's chimp Who, when given a pen Draws only the bars of his cage Like the gown unworn Like the lawn unmowed/overgrown Like the car, all rust Like the lungs, black with tar Like the bones, black with dust Like the heart, black with shame Like the eyes, black with age Like the stillborns living in his formaldehyde grave Like his mouth open, crying out to be saved What is left? What is left? What is left? What is left? And I'm hiding from the government And my fictional wife From my dreams and from my memories I am running from my life I'm hiding from you, I'm hiding from you I'm hiding from you I'm hiding from my mistress And her dream sextets I’m hiding from my family I’m hiding from the explanations Of all I’ve been doing wrong I'm running from your lips I'm running from your mouth I’m hiding from your room I’m hiding from doubt I’m hiding from living I’m hiding from everything I'm hiding from you When did I meet you? Maybe two years ago So much has happened since You were a million fears ago So many since have taken your place A million more things to keep me awake I don't sleep any more I just rest my eyes I'm running from your lips I'm running from your cries Your convulsions that crack The crust of the earth Your pantomime moans So forced, so rehearsed Your little tongue That moves mountains That moves man to madness Your little tongue That deceives and administers lies/life Your little tongue in the ocean The iceberg that kills Your little tongue in my mouth Your little blade in my side (?) You're the first I call I hate the sound of your voice I hate the words you use The phrases you think so choice But I'd kiss you a thousand times If you'd only turn your head But you never your head Because just like me, you're not alive, you're dead In the German black forest of which I know nothing I dream you ride a black horse Back and forth Back and forth Back and forth With no compass to follow Or landmark to reach You perambulate aimlessly through nondescript trees In the nondescript forest Of which I know nothing And can't visualise at all Save your faint silhouette And I clutch and it evades I wake from the dream No, no, none of it’s true I don’t sleep, I don’t sleep! I wander through cowardice, thought And regret Through nothingness, through sagas That never took place Your kiss, never given Your touch, never felt Your words, never spoken Your gift, never dealt Your lies, all around Your deceit, infinite I’m hiding from your never ending torrent of shit Like the spouse happily married Who still dies alone Like the world famous actor Who's still completely unknown Like the German black forest Of you I know nothing I know not your eyes, your skin, your stench, your sins, your arms, your hold, your heart, your folds, your nails, your grip, your grin, your tics, your sex, your shame I know only your name And what’s left of the lover Who doesn’t exist? Who knows not how many fantasies Involve her kiss? And what’s left of the dreamer Who dreams, and dreams, and dreams and dreams… And who thinks he isn’t dreaming But thinks that he is free And what of the endless, heedless, needless are we And what of the endless, heedless, needless are we And what of the endless, heedless, needless are we Will it end Will it ever let me be? No, When the smoke clears, it rains, it pours When it rains, it pours When it rains, your name When the smoke clears, what's left?