S07E05 - Rafidah Jalil & Benjamin Byrne - The Truth Behind IVF & Miscarriage That No One Talks About скачать в хорошем качестве

S07E05 - Rafidah Jalil & Benjamin Byrne - The Truth Behind IVF & Miscarriage That No One Talks About

What do you do when your deepest longing is also your deepest source of pain? How do you stay connected to yourself and the people you love, and continue to persist when life throws you challenges that wear down and break your spirit? How do you continue forward in a dark endless tunnel where you struggle to see the light at the end? In this episode of the Clean Your Toilet Podcast, Rafidah Jalil, edutainer (Kak Fifi and Mimi), volunteer & director, Fertility Support SG, sits down with Benjamin Byrne, content creator The Smiling Afro, to share a journey shaped by uncertainty, heartbreak, surrender, and the quiet resilience required to keep choosing hope. Before becoming a mother, Rafidah was a high-achieving SVP in a bank. She worked hard, planned well, and excelled under pressure. But infertility disrupted every formula she knew. Multiple IVF cycles, miscarriage, and years of waiting pulled her into emotional territory no career success had ever prepared her for. She speaks with honesty about the shadows of this journey: the loneliness of silent grief, thoughts of suicide, the spiritual exhaustion of praying without guarantees, and the identity crisis that comes from feeling like you can’t “achieve” the life you imagined. This conversation explores how infertility reshaped her marriage: revealing the limits of strength, the importance of communication, and the deep vulnerability required to let someone walk with you through pain they cannot fully understand. She shares how her lowest moments opened doors to unexpected connection: community, shared stories, and the healing that comes not from solutions, but from being seen by others who understand. Today, as a mother of three, Rafidah carries her past not as a wound, but as wisdom. She holds the paradox of joy and grief, gain and loss and shows how relationships deepen when we flow with what life brings, instead of hardening ourselves. If you’ve ever: — Faced a season of waiting with no clear ending — Questioned your worth when things fell apart — Struggled to communicate pain you can barely name — Carried grief quietly because you didn’t know where it belonged — Or learned to surrender a life that didn’t go to plan… This episode is a tender reminder that surrender is not weakness, it is the moment your heart makes space for something new. ABOUT 🚽 Welcome to the Clean Your Toilet Podcast - yes, that’s the actual name, and no, it’s not about porcelain (only). Let’s be real: we’ve all got things we avoid. This podcast is where we talk about the messes we pretend aren’t there — physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. Because spoiler alert: just like a neglected toilet, what you ignore doesn’t vanish, it festers. Each season brings one speaker & multiple hosts together. Each from different walks of life with different expertise, meeting for the first time; for real, unscripted conversations about life. Filmed in a single sitting, we concentrate the essence of candor and spontaneity of live conversation. We explore the habits, patterns, and inner gunk that quietly shape your outer life. We’re here for the uncomfortable truths, oddly satisfying metaphors, and yes, those sacred bathroom moments that somehow lead to spiritual insight and emotional release. If you like what you see/hear, get in touch with us, and let's get those inner toilets clean! Contact ✉️: cleanyourtoiletpodcast@gmail.com Socials 🌐:   / cleanyourtoiletpodcast   🌐: https://x.com/cyt_podcast 🌐:   / cleanyourtoiletpodcast   🌐:   / cytpodcast999   🌐:   / clean-your-toilet-podcast   Listen On Spotify: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/sh... Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast... Audible: https://www.audible.com/podcast/Clean... Pocketcast: https://pca.st/fune0qwl Rephonic: https://rephonic.com/podcasts/clean-y... #CleanYourToiletPodcast #Shadows #Relationships #InnerWork #PersonalMastery #InfertilityJourney #Grief #Healing #Marriage #IVF #LettingGo #Podcast #Singapore