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When it comes to change, we’re often our own worst enemy. Anyone who has tried to embark on a professional or personal challenge is familiar with the voice of the inner critic that says things like “you’re not good enough”, “this is a stupid idea”, “nothing will ever work out”. Most self-development advice espouses the need to overcome self-doubt and banish negative thoughts. But as a therapist and Human Behavior professor, I know that this prevailing notion that calls for eradicating so-called “negative emotions” is not just plain wrong – it can actually backfire. While it’s true that self-doubt can be toxic, what’s more problematic is the fact that we never learn to deal with this normal, expected emotion in healthy ways. Any change brings up fear and worries–and learning to cope with uncertainty is a skill. Melody Wilding teaches human behavior at The City University of New York and is a nationally recognized Master Coach who distills psychological insights into actionable career advice. A licensed social worker trained at Columbia University, she’s helped thousands of professional women and female entrepreneurs master their mindset and emotions for greater success. Melody has worked with CEOs and executives running top startups along with published authors and media personalities. Melody is syndicated columnist and regular contributor to Inc., Forbes, PsychCentral, and TheMuse.com. Her advice has been featured by dozens of major media outlets like New York Magazine, Fast Company, Entrepreneur and more. She holds a Masters from Columbia University and graduated summa cum laude with a degree in Psychology from Rutgers University. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at http://ted.com/tedx