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erosion of myself

later this month, ill be preparing to move away from the hometown i grew up in its a strange combination of feelings really .. on one hand theres the excitement and anticipation of going somewhere new, seeing more of the world, and being able to live life in a new way that i get to decide and figure out but on the other, theres essentially saying goodbye to everything ive ever known and the people and places who have helped create a lot of the experiences and memories that have gone into creating the me that exists in this moment going further, although i know ill remember the most important experiences and memories, theres been a small fear i have that ill begin to forget some of the smaller day to day experiences and memories of mine .. the kinds of things that might feel inconsequential or even boring and tiresome during the moment, but that later on in life you might grow to miss and to become nostalgic over ive been thinking a lot lately about what it means to 'be,' and just how many changes a person can endure before theyre now someone else and their old selves are essentially dead i feel a lot of my thoughts on that stuff are far from the point of the rest of what im talking about here and theres a lot on that stuff as well so i dont think ill elaborate too much but i feel as if im taking steps right now that will go on to accelerate the dying of who i am .. i think i understand that change and continual death of the self is something thats inevitable and unavoidable as one grows and matures, but this time it just feels different it may have something to do with how this time around im not young enough to be unaware of how my actions are playing exactly into it and its acceleration although im very excited to leave, its something ive felt a little conflicted on ill be leaving both everything thats familiar to me and in a way also the me that exists right now behind though at the same time, with the dying of who i am now will come whats next ill have the opportunity to grow, mature, become something more, and become something that i cant be right now and thats something to look forward to, right? _____ spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/7xUEV... bandcamp: https://azali.bandcamp.com/ patreon:   / azali   contact: [email protected]