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Letter to You

Fuck it We were young We were reckless We didn’t give a damn. Parking lots, broken glass Living life too fast Windows shatter, middle fingers to the world Didn’t need a future, just me and you, girl Laughing in the dark, running off adrenaline Only thing that mattered was who we were against — we didn’t care No rules, no sleep, no fear in our veins Thought we were immune to endings and pain We said forever like it couldn’t end Laughing at death like it wasn’t a threat We were running from truth, stealing time we couldn’t keep Every laugh felt loud, every promise felt deep Then the doctors spoke, said your body was done Untreatable cancer, hit me harder than a gun Weeks in my bed, face buried in sheets Crying till my chest felt hollow and weak — I should’ve known Didn’t eat, didn’t breathe, didn’t leave that room You were everything, now the world was a tomb We said forever like it couldn’t end Laughing at death like it wasn’t a threat We were running from truth, stealing time we couldn’t keep Every laugh felt loud, every promise felt deep But lies don’t die, they just learn to bleed Love don’t save you from reality I read the signs, still played my part Hope is a drug when you’re scared of the dark You came back smiling, said the doctors were wrong Said you felt fine, said you’d be here long — say it again, yet again Didn’t buy it, but I wanted to So I chose your lie over what I knew Back on the streets, back to our ways Security chasing us through alleys and rain Cheeks full of stolen goods, laughing like kids If you were still smiling, I could live with it We said forever like it couldn’t end Laughing at death like it wasn’t a threat We were running from truth, stealing time we couldn’t keep Every laugh felt loud, every promise felt deep Say we’re fine, say we got more time Say your breath don’t taste like goodbye Hold my hand, don’t look at the signs If we don’t name it, it won’t be mine Run with me till the lights go red If love’s a lie, let it live in my head You promised me nothing could tear us apart I loved you reckless, no armor, no guard Didn’t know if you felt it, never asked why Didn’t wanna hear a truth that could make it die Joked “marry me,” you said “yes” right away — we said forever Stormed that church like we owned that day Dress ripped up, mud on your skin Priest choking on fear while the sirens came in We said forever like it couldn’t end Laughing at death like it wasn’t a threat We were running from truth, stealing time we couldn’t keep Every laugh felt loud, every promise felt deep Found an abandoned house, roof caving in You hated scary places but you stayed with a grin Rain through the ceiling, cold in the air Still felt warm just knowing you were there Made love that night, first time for me Didn’t ask about yours — didn’t wanna see If truth could shatter what I felt inside I’d rather stay blind than lose that night We said forever like it couldn’t end Laughing at death like it wasn’t a threat We were running from truth, stealing time we couldn’t keep Every laugh felt louder, every promise felt steep But lies don’t die, they just learn to bleed Love don’t save you from reality I read the signs, still played my part Hope is a drug when you’re scared of the dark Then you started coughing blood, fading away Losing weight, hair falling, day by day — you lied And I hate you, yeah I hate that it’s true You made me alive, then you ripped me in two Emotions scattered, nothing feels real Was the love the lie or the lie the deal? We said forever like it couldn’t end But death was listening We were running from truth, stealing time we couldn’t keep Now the laughs don’t echo, and the promises sleep Slipped pills in my drink, I blacked out cold When I woke up, you were already gone No note, no letter, no final sound Just ghosts where you used to be around Still hate you, still love you, both intertwined Hope the worms don’t show you mercy this time.