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Requiem

In loving memory of Dennis. You are not behind me. You are carried. Love this deep does not recede. It settles, quiet and permanent, like a second pulse beneath the first. Time does not loosen it. It only teaches it where to live. What others call release is only distance they never had to cross. You did not leave a silence. You altered the air. You moved into the quiet between moments, into the weight of stillness when I am alone. In the moments that steady me when I should be unmoored. What aches is not loss, but presence pressing inward, asking to stay. You didn’t vanish. You changed form. Grief isn’t absence. It’s incorporation. I am becoming you piece by piece. The way you smiled. The way you spoke. The way you loved so fiercely it carved holes in the fabric of time. Love like yours doesn’t leave. It settles, learning new ways to remain. I have felt all of it. The sorrow, the longing, even the anger. Letting it hollow me out. Only in that hollowing can something new take root. I move differently now. I speak with an echo that wasn’t mine before. I breathe with something layered into me. What you were did not end. It took refuge. I will not set you down. I will move forward carrying you. That is how you remain. I am where you continue. A special thank you and Dedication to David, Chuck, and Thomas. David, I am very glad we met when we had. Things have been rough for us both. I am glad we can share this music together, and I will be forever grateful for the encouragement and support you have given me. Chuck, you continue to be a continued source of inspiration and drive for me musically. I value your profound insight into music, and I don't think I would be where I am at today without you. Thank you for all you have done and continue to do. Thomas, since knowing you, you have done perhaps more than you know to help me through some very dark times. I have been enjoying working with you musically, and I look forward to what we create going forward. Thank you to both Scott and Rebecca for the vocal work here. You guys are amazing, and really helped to make breathe life into this work. I hope this finds all who listen well, and happy holidays.