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Leave a voicemail at +1 (917) 336-8340 and I’ll give you some advice. Welcome to my new show. Every episode, I spend $100 on scratch-offs and see how much I win (or lose). Today we talk about going to Egypt, cookies, and the existential crisis I had about making stuff. Also, I answered a few voicemails from the hotline. 00:00 – Scratching Lottery Tickets Until I Win $1,000,000 00:36 – Why This Show Is Anti-Gambling 01:26 – Charity, Zakat, and If I Ever Win 01:51 – Just Go to Egypt (Seriously) 02:45 – First Win of the Day ($10) 03:21 – Why People Don’t Travel Enough 05:23 – Take Your Grandma to Cairo 06:32 – The Call-In Hotline Is Live 08:28 – Cookies Are the Best Baked Good 12:26 – Eating Lunch to Be a Better Husband 14:53 – Everything in Adulthood Is a Compromise 18:03 – What’s the Point of Making Anything? 20:24 – Why Getting What You Want Feels Rare 23:28 – Breaking Even (Again) 24:01 – Improving the Show as It Goes 26:03 – Modest Goals and View Counts 29:16 – Today’s Lottery Damage ($80 Down) 29:29 – Advice Calls Begin 29:38 – How Do You Date If You’re Neurotic? 33:27 – How to Live When the World Feels Broken 39:17 – Being the Last Fun Friend in Your 30s 43:29 – Should You Date If You’re About to Move? 46:46 – Subway Take: Extra Sauce Should Be Free 49:27 – What Should This Show Become? 50:12 – Final Thoughts & Goodbye