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Black Friday Offer! Get the Somatic Attachment Healing Course Free for Life When You Start Your 7‑Day Trial of the All-Access Pass. https://attachment.personaldevelopmen... When a Dismissive Avoidant pulls back in a relationship, the instinct might be to match their energy — pull away, stay silent, or create space. But neuroscience and practical experience show that this approach can unintentionally reinforce unhealthy dynamics and keep you trapped in cycles of intermittent reinforcement. In this video, Thais Gibson unpacks what happens in a Dismissive Avoidant’s brain when they pull back, why chasing or mirroring their withdrawal often backfires, and what healthier strategies look like for setting boundaries and maintaining connection without sacrificing yourself. You’ll learn: ✅ How Dismissive Avoidants’ brains respond to rejection and why they tend to “deactivate” under pressure ✅ Why chasing or emotionally pressuring them amplifies their threat response and pushes them further away ✅ The neuroscience-backed strategy for calmly matching energy while maintaining warmth and respect ✅ Why constantly mirroring their withdrawal can create cycles of intermittent reinforcement that feel addictive but are damaging ✅ How to clarify your needs, standards, and non-negotiables to protect yourself and avoid being manipulated ✅ Practical ways to communicate expectations in a relationship with a Dismissive Avoidant ✅ How regulating your own nervous system can break unhealthy patterns and support secure connection Episode Breakdown: 00:00 – Should You Match Their Energy? 01:16 – 1. Dismissive Avoidants Go Numb When It Comes to Rejection Cues 02:09 – 2. Chasing Somebody Tends to Amplify Their Threat System 02:46 – 3. Matching Energy Would, in Turn, Reduce a Threat 03:24 – When You Match Their Energy 05:17 – Step 1: Get Clear About What You’re Truly Looking for in a Relationship. 05:46 – Step 2: Vet How They Show Up and Decide if They Are the Right Person for You 06:00 – Black Friday: Somatic Processing Course Promo 06:28 – Upcoming Events Meet the Host Thais Gibson is the founder of The Personal Development School and a world leader in attachment theory. With a Ph.D. and over a dozen certifications, she’s helped more than 70,000 people reprogram their subconscious and build thriving relationships. Helpful Resources: 🧠 Take the Free Attachment Style Quiz https://attachment.personaldevelopmen... 📚 Read the Learning Love Book https://attachment.personaldevelopmen... 🎧 Discover Podcast Episodes https://attachment.personaldevelopmen... 📝 Read the PDS Blog https://blog.personaldevelopmentschoo... Let’s Connect on Socials: 📸 Instagram: / thepersonaldevelopmentschool 📘 Facebook: / thepersonaldevelopmentschool 🎵 TikTok: / thaisgibson 💼 LinkedIn: / thepersonaldevelopmentschool #DismissiveAvoidant #AttachmentStyles #AttachmentTheory #IntegratedAttachmentTheory #ThaisGibson #PersonalDevelopmentSchool #RelationshipHealing #EmotionalIntimacy #Boundaries #NervousSystemRegulation #IntermittentReinforcement #RelationshipGrowth #SelfWorthHealing Understanding these dynamics allows you to stay grounded, communicate your needs clearly, and build relationships where connection is mutual — not dictated by withdrawal or fear.