Why the Fight Isn’t About the Fight, Repairing Conflict Without Losing Each Other скачать в хорошем качестве

Why the Fight Isn’t About the Fight, Repairing Conflict Without Losing Each Other

What if the argument you’re having isn’t actually about what you think it is? In this episode of Love in Practice, we take you inside a real, unfiltered conflict from our own relationship — not to perform it, but to examine what’s really happening underneath the surface when pain turns into power struggles, shutdown, or resentment. We explore: Why conflict often escalates even when both partners are “doing the work” How unspoken needs, childhood wounds, and power dynamics hijack connection The hidden ways we ask for crumbs instead of what we truly need Why repair — not avoidance — is where relationships actually grow How to reconnect after rupture without abandoning yourself or your partner This episode isn’t about fixing your partner. It’s about understanding what conflict is trying to show you — and how to use it as a doorway to deeper safety, intimacy, and trust. If you’ve ever thought: “Why do we keep having the same fight?” “I don’t feel met, but I don’t know how to ask” “We love each other… so why is this so hard?” This conversation is for you. EP 7 Fin 👉 Take the free Relational Compass to understand your conflict patterns and triggers: https://lipcouples.com/compass 00:00 – The fight underneath the fight 01:18 – Recording an episode about conflict… while in conflict 02:19 – “Twinkle Gate” and why small moments carry big wounds 04:09 – How past relationships shape present reactions 06:46 – Wanting your partner to feel your pain 08:14 – When compassionate communication stops working 10:05 – The hidden power struggle no one names 12:13 – “I just wanted to be held” 14:35 – Demand vs. request: where repair breaks down 16:03 – Asking for crumbs instead of the full meal 18:34 – The father / authority dynamic in relationships 21:09 – How being “the capable one” creates disconnection 24:13 – Power dynamics we don’t realize we’re creating 25:34 – Choosing your energy instead of staying stuck 26:14 – Co-regulation and grounding during conflict 28:11 – Expressing anger safely without blame 30:20 – The limits of Nonviolent Communication 33:53 – When one partner becomes “the teacher” 37:04 – Why unmet needs don’t get asked for 39:15 – Conflict clusters and breakthrough moments 41:33 – What real repair actually requires 44:09 – Kintsugi: repairing relationships with gold 47:24 – Asking for support instead of testing your partner 50:03 – Staying physically connected during hard conversations 52:01 – Why waiting to be “fully healed” doesn’t work 54:14 – When to stay and when to leave 57:07 – Why your partner triggers you like no one else 57:50 – The Relational Compass: responding instead of reacting