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Hallmark Made Me Do It

Happy Valentine's Day Lyrics: They marked it on the calendar in corporate red A mandatory romance tax, or so the commercials said Roses cost triple what they did last week But if I don't buy them now, I'm a heartless cheap freak The restaurants are booked, they've doubled all their prices And gas stations are selling wilted flowers in crisis But I bought the roses anyway The chocolates in the heart-shaped throw away The teddy bear that cost more than it should I swore I wouldn't play the game knowing I would I knew it was a corporate scam But here I am with roses, good boy that I am Saint Valentine didn't die for this commercial hell He'd roll over in his grave at the crap stores now sell "Prove your love with diamonds" - that's what the billboards scream My credit card debt is romance it would seem I show my love 364 days without the guilt or pressure But today I'd better cough up cash or get denied your treasurer But I bought the roses anyway The chocolates in the heart-shaped throw away The teddy bear that cost more than it should I swore I wouldn't play the game knowing I would I knew it was a corporate scam But here I am with roses, good boy that I am I could have cooked dinner on a random Tuesday night Surprised you with affection when the moment felt just right But no, I had to wait until the day that Hallmark chose And pay mortgage-payment prices for some soon-to-be-dead rose Yeah, I bought the roses anyway The reservation's set for eight Got a card with something Hallmark wrote I caved so lets go on our date Later me and my wallet will both cry when it gets late