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Your attraction patterns aren't random. And they're not just about "chemistry." There's actual brain science behind who you're drawn to—and why certain people feel exciting while others feel flat, even when they're objectively good for you. In this video, I break down Dr. Helen Fisher's research on the four attraction styles (Explorer, Builder, Director, Negotiator) and how your brain chemistry quietly shapes who feels irresistible and who feels boring. But here's the thing: just because someone activates your attraction system doesn't mean they're right for you. I walk you through the difference between attraction (chemistry that supports connection) and activation (chemistry that mirrors a familiar pattern), and how to tell if you're choosing someone because they're healthy—or just because they feel known. This isn't about fighting your biology. It's about understanding it so you actually have choice. TIMESTAMPS: 0:00 - Intro: The quiet truth about attraction [You'll fill these in after editing, but here's the structure:] 2:30 - The four attraction types (Explorer, Builder, Director, Negotiator) 7:30 - Attraction vs. activation: What's the difference? 9:00 - Why calm can feel boring (and what that means) 10:00 - Practical application: What to do with this information 11:15 - Closing thoughts ABOUT ME: I'm a somatic experiencing practitioner (SEP) with a Master of Education in Special Education. I help people understand the nervous system patterns that shape intimacy and relationships—working with the body, not just the mind. My approach integrates somatic work, nervous system education, and plant essence therapy to help you shift the patterns that keep you stuck in the same relational cycles. DISCLAIMER: This content is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for therapy or medical advice. If you're struggling with trauma, relationship issues, or mental health concerns, please seek support from a licensed professional.