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CJ Pingeton hopes to start conversations in her community about the dissonance between the expectations and true experiences of how we feel grief, and prompt some understanding and grace-giving to others and to ourselves. In her talk, she describes how the traditional "5 stages of grief" are limiting and unrealistic, especially coming from her own experiences of grief and loss. CJ Pingeton graduated with her undergraduate degree in Sociology from UMass Amherst along with a certificate in Social Work and Social Welfare. In alignment with her passion for social-emotional learning and educational equity, CJ works within the Amherst-Pelham school district and Girls Inc. of the Valley. She is passionate about using art, poetry, and prose to help herself and others better understand our own identities and difficult feelings. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx