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New Ghost

Take a hit to help me sleep… Did I hear you call my name? No answer in the dark, so I crawl back into numbness, Pray it’s all just in my head… Woke up to piss, didn’t even look for you, Sleep-stained steps toward the bathroom door. Half a stride— FROZEN. A scream choking behind my teeth— “What the fuck? I know you heard me coming… Why didn’t you call out? Why didn’t you answer?” Silence like a tomb. Knuckles on the door, a trembling HELLO?! No response. No breath. Just the weight of dread pulling me inside— And there you were, Locked in a pose I’ll never burn from my brain. A statue of the last second you were alive. A moment carved into my spine forever. Did you call my name? I wasn’t sure… But now I know— There’s a new ghost in this room, And regret is screaming louder than anything. GHOST IN MY HEAD— GHOST IN THAT ROOM— GHOST OF WHAT I MISSED AND GHOST OF WHAT I LOST TOO SOON. A whisper in the hallway, A shadow in my sleep— I failed you in a moment I didn’t even know to keep. Three hours past your funeral, I was still holding the weight of your absence— And she walked in with venom in her throat, Spit out, “You’re taking over.” Like grief makes me a thief. She kicked me out As if I never mattered, As if love wasn’t real, As if years turned to ash in an instant. Grab some clothes, Leave everything else— Not even my damn cat. A life amputated without anesthetic. Supervised visits To pick through the scraps of my own existence, While they raided what you built Like vultures in a feeding frenzy. They sold your house to the first hand raised— Like your memory weighed nothing, Like your life was a yard sale, Like you were just a name on a deed And not a person who meant something. VULTURES. CLAWS OUT. TEARING THROUGH THE HOME YOU LEFT BEHIND. NOTHING SACRED, NOTHING HONORED— JUST THEIR GREED AND MY DECLINE. I don’t even know if you left me anything— Not that they would’ve let me see it. Not that they ever cared. All I know is this: I lost you. Then I lost everything else. And they moved on like you were nothing. You’re gone, But the silence you left still screams— And every night I hear it again: Did you call my name? Did you call my name…? A new ghost walks beside me— Not you, But the regret Of not knowing, Of not being there, Of losing you Twice.