When Helping Isn't Helpful: A Lesson from Walking the Dog скачать в хорошем качестве

When Helping Isn't Helpful: A Lesson from Walking the Dog

Top O' the Mornin' to Ya! TLDR: In this reflection, I share a personal experience about my daughter being concerned with our dog's leash, despite the dog being unbothered. This reveals a powerful lesson about how we often project our concerns onto others who may be perfectly content with their situation, and how understanding others' perspectives can transform our relationships. What? My daughter Liz and I were walking our dog Phaedra to school the other morning. Liz holds the leash on our walks, and she kept getting bothered because the leash would slip under Phaedra's leg. She would continuously stop to fix it and rearrange the leash. The interesting part? Phaedra couldn't care less about the leash being under her leg. She was just happily sniffing around, turning this way and that, enjoying the warm sunshine. The leash lightly lying under her leg from her collar down didn't bother her at all. Why? This simple moment made me reflect on how often we do this in life. We get bothered by things that don't actually matter to the other person involved. We project our concerns onto others, assuming they must be as bothered as we are. It reminded me of growing up when my parents would always remind us to turn off the lights. They'd say, "Turn off the lights! Can't you remember to turn off the lights?" At the time it seemed so important, but with today's efficient lighting, the difference is minimal AND yet, I keep finding myself saying "turn off the lights" to my own family. Lesson Sometimes we need to step back and ask: "Does this really bother them, or am I just projecting my concerns?" Stephen Covey, author of "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People," teaches us to "seek first to understand." When I applied this principle to my daughter's behavior with the dog, I realized something important. Liz's concern about the leash wasn't misplaced—it perfectly aligned with her nature as a loving, caring, and respectful person. She's naturally empathetic with people and animals alike. I was doing to Liz exactly what I thought she was doing to the dog—assuming my perspective was the right one. But for Liz, helping Phaedra by adjusting the leash was an expression of her identity, who God created her to be. Apply Take a moment today to reflect on an area where you've tried to "help" someone who wasn't looking for help. Or better yet, identify a situation where you've recognized someone in a position that bothers you, but they seem perfectly content with it. Write down how you've coped with that difference in perspective. How have you adjusted your thinking to align with theirs? When have you needed to let go of your desire to "fix" something that the other person doesn't see as broken? Remember, sometimes what looks like a problem to us isn't a problem at all to someone else. True understanding comes from seeing the world through their eyes, not just our own. Be blessed, --- If you're a Christian man fighting with isolation, secret sin, or doing everything right but not feeling fulfilled in your leadership of family and business, let's have a conversation. Hit the link below and we'll chat. https://brian.chat #ChristianLeadership #FamilyPerspective #UnderstandingOthers #KingdomInsights #ProjectionMindset