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"When you reach the top of the mountain, how do you get to your next mountain? You gotta go down into the valley." Tom shares NPR's review of J. Cole's The Fall Off and the mountaintop metaphor that hit home. This sparks a wide conversation — Dunning-Kruger, tying identity to jobs and relationships, Lorenzo feeling like a teenager who hasn't hit "grown-up" yet, and Iman's bent-arrow takeaway: just give yourself a pat on the back. 🎵 Listen to The Fall Off by J. Cole: https://amzn.to/3ZQFJRS Guest Co-Host: Iman Bakayoko Business & Development Manager, Signal + Pattern LLC AI Management, Georgetown University TIMESTAMPS: 0:00 NPR review of J. Cole's "The Fall Off" — "I cried, it's so good" 0:24 When you reach the top of the mountain, you have to go down to reach the next one 0:38 The Dunning-Kruger effect — sine waves of knowledge 1:01 Tom: "In college I thought my job was gonna be what makes me" 1:22 Coming back to The Velvet Rage — identity tied to external things 1:38 "I think you want to secure your identity in something outside of yourself" 2:08 Lorenzo: wanting a full-time job as the marker of being a grown-up 2:38 Six years in the gig economy since undergrad 3:14 Different definitions of adulting — growing from academic to professional 3:52 "You still feel like a teenager?" — "Of course, dude" 4:09 The comparison to others is meaningless — a lesson from high school 4:37 Jealousy is human — "I don't let it show" 5:28 "I still feel like I'm in this weird phase" — allowed to grow but not yet fully responsible 5:55 24 years old, still on parents' insurance 6:17 Moving out at 18 and moving to Boston as transition moments 6:33 "Lorenzo wants to be a straight arrow but he's actually a bent arrow" 6:53 Iman's takeaway: think about what you've done and what you have inside 7:40 "Just give yourself a pat on the back and see how that changes everything" 8:00 Not corny inspiration — just a casual listen 8:32 "You sit in your car afterwards — hmm, I guess I'm really good at walking" FOLLOW US: TikTok: / therealitygappod Instagram: / therealitygappod LinkedIn: / reality-gap-the-pod WATCH OR LISTEN ON: Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/1rxdYB0... Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast... YouTube: / @therealitygappod Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/f38... iHeartRadio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-th... Want to share your own career mess? Got an idea for an episode? social@realitygappod.com Interested in advertising? social@realitygappod.com Learn more at https://realitygappod.com Note: We may earn revenue from some of the links we provide. The Reality Gap Pod is a production of Signal + Pattern LLC. Registered trademark. #therealitygappod #therealitygap #podcast #jcole #thefalloff #mountaintop #dunningkruger #identity #adulting #velvetrage #bentarrows #genz