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In this compelling talk, Dr. Nicole examines the hidden legacies shaping modern marriage dynamics, uncovering how systemic factors and socialization continue to influence relationships. She reflects on the historical view of women as burdens, valued primarily for what they could offer men through systems like dowries, and the enduring societal expectations placed on them, often in unexpected ways, despite progress in women’s education and empowerment. Drawing on her experience as a family therapist, Dr. Nicole highlights the importance of mutual trust, support, and shared leadership in modern partnerships. She challenges both men and women to question outdated narratives and reimagine marriage as a sanctuary of equality, authenticity, and connection. This talk is an invitation to reflect, rethink, and redefine the foundations of thriving relationships today. Dr. Nicole Chen is a licensed counsellor with over 23 years of experience and the founder and Clinical Director of Heal Systemic Therapy Centre. Specializing in Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy and Multigenerational Family Therapy, she has dedicated the past 11 years to supporting couples and families. Previously an Associate Professor with 15+ years of teaching experience, Dr. Nicole has published several journal articles and presented at national and international conferences. She has also served as a research paper reviewer for psychology and qualitative studies and was a committee member of the Qualitative Research Association of Malaysia (QRAM) from 2018 to 2020. An active board member of the Malaysian Marriage and Family Therapy Association (MyMFT), Dr. Nicole served as President from 2021–2023 and was reappointed for 2023–2025. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx