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In this episode of At The Table, worship leader Mary Pagan shares her journey through loss, identity, and the grace of God. Raised in church as the daughter of pastors and the youngest of five, Mary felt the pressure to be perfect from a young age. At 18, her life was shaken by the loss of her father, followed by a season of rebellion and searching for identity through external validation. While in college, she encountered a church community that modeled grace and redemption, leading her back to Christ step by step. In 2021, Mary faced another deep loss with the passing of her brother. Today, Mary travels internationally as a worship leader, collaborating with artists like Tercer Cielo and Israel Houghton, and ministering on major platforms including the Latin Grammy stage. Her story is a powerful reminder that God’s presence meets us even in our deepest grief. ✅ Follow Charlie: / charlie.zapata ✅ Follow Mary: / themarypagan ✅ Follow At The Table: / atthetable.tv 00:00 - Episode Introduction and Guest Welcome 01:29 - Mary’s Introduction and Appreciation 02:43 - Growing Up as a Pastor’s Daughter 04:50 - Identity Struggles and Rebellion 06:34 - Early Worship Ministry Experiences 08:17 - Personal Honesty and Struggle 09:54 - Honesty with Parents and Pressure 11:55 - Father’s Passing and Its Impact 13:38 - Restoration and Faith After Loss 16:19 - Journey of Coming Back to Faith 20:15 - Responsibility, Identity, and Scripture 24:15 - Church Culture and Anthropocentric Views 26:41 - Grace, Humility, and Service 29:22 - Empathy and Servant Heart 33:34 - Restoration of Family Relationships 35:28 - Navigating Collaboration and Idolization 39:15 - Staying Grounded and Accountability 42:12 - Encouragement and Personal Witness 46:37 - Advice for Those Experiencing Tragedy 49:04 - Faith When God Feels Distant 52:52 - Final Reflections on Suffering and Faith 56:17 - Closing Remarks and Podcast Promotion