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✰✰ * PLEASE READ . * VERY IMPORTANT* !! ✰✰ Hi guys.. basically i just wanted to give you guys some insight into my personal life, why I've been so inconsistent with my channel throughout the past year, and how I kind of "lost myself" ....I feel like I owe you guys an explanation. In this video, I talk about a very touchy topic, something very difficult for me to deal with. Why put it up on YouTube? Because maybe, me talking about topics such as mental illness and whatnot will help others feel less alone. Or maybe, even help people who need help actually GET help. I just felt like I couldn't continue making videos without clueing you guys in on a big part of who I am/what I've been dealing with... I have been pretty drained mentally for the past year and now maybe you understand a little bit more of 'why'... I love makeup and beauty but my channel is more of just ME. Me being 1000% real...1000% of the time. This is who I am. If you like it, WELCOME :) If you don't , you can unsubscribe... there's like 985049890850958590809390,3890830983093803 other beauty channels out there ;) Bipolar disorder is very serious. Please don't leave any negative comments on this video. they will be deleted. This is a very touchy subject for me to put out there, but 99.9% of my subscribers are compassionate and have huge hearts. I feel like I owe this to THEM. I'm sorry this video is so long... I still have more footage and that will be in a Part 2 of this video coming soon...whenever I feel like listening to myself ramble for another half hour enough to be able to edit it...lol * PART 2: • BARING IT ALL: How I Lost My"self" Dating ... Thank you all for watching, reading this, being there for me...anything. your support means THE WORLD TO ME. XOXO Nicole Christine TALK TO ME / KEEP IN TOUCH WITH ME: TWITTER: / xcherrybo0m7x INSTAGRAM: @nic0lechristine_x0 (0's are ZEROES not O's.... I know I'm annoying) *HUGE DISCLAIMER:::: I am NOT a doctor or a psychiatrist or a psychologist. I do not know the exact definitions of specific terms , I'm just generally speaking. I took many classes on psychological illnesses in college, and I did a great amount of research on this topic waaay before i filmed this video. The person I speak about in this video IS clinically diagnosed (not me just throwing the term around)..