Which Attachment Style Are You? (Secure Relationships Part 2) скачать в хорошем качестве

Which Attachment Style Are You? (Secure Relationships Part 2)

Most of what we do in relationships is on autopilot—shaped by how we were cared for (or not) as kids. In this episode, Sharla and Robert unpack the three main attachment styles (Secure, Anxious, and Avoidant), share eye-opening childhood reflection questions, real-life couple stories, and checklists you can use to learn about your attachment style. You’ll finally understand why you chase, why they pull away, and how to stop using labels as weapons—so you can actually build the safety and closeness you both crave. Timestamps 00:00 – Welcome back to the Secure-Relationship series 00:00 – Why 90% of relationship behavior is unconscious 00:00 – The danger (and power) of attachment labels 00:00 – How your childhood wired your attachment style 00:00 – Childhood reflection questions 00:00 – Secure attachment recap + checklist 00:00 – Avoidant attachment story + checklist 00:00 – Anxious attachment story + checklist 00:00 – The #1 principle: Become an expert on each other 00:00 – Acceptance + responsibility (without shame or excuses) Key Takeaways Your attachment style isn’t a flaw—it’s an adaptation from childhood. Never weaponize labels (“You’re so avoidant!”). Use them for compassion only. Secure relationships require: safety first, equal power, and the relationship as the “sun.” The path to more security = Acceptance of who you both are + owning your impact. You can’t force change in your partner. You create it through consistent safety. Quick Attachment Style Checklists (from the episode) Secure – I enjoy closeness but am also comfortable alone. Disagreements don’t shake me. I trust easily. Avoidant – I recharge best alone. Closeness can feel smothering. I downplay emotions. Anxious – I worry my partner will leave. I need frequent reassurance. Small things feel like big threats. Resources for Deeper Learning Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love by Amir Levine & Rachel Heller → The classic that made attachment theory mainstream. https://www.attachedthebook.com Wired for Love by Stan Tatkin → Perfect follow-up if you loved our “allies, not adversaries” and “secure-functioning” language. (Also check out his newer book In Each Other’s Care and We Do)