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"Golden rule... is for people who still have skin." 🏜️🥃 Two centuries is a long time to hold a grudge. The Ghoul, once the beloved Hollywood star Cooper Howard, has spent 200 years wandering the irradiated wastes of America. He’s not a hero, he’s not a villain—he’s a force of nature in a duster, fueled by cherry-flavored serum and a relentless search for his past. This track is a gritty, darkly comedic journey into the mind of the wasteland's deadliest bounty hunter. 🎤 LYRICS [Verse 1 - Smooth crooner, semi-serious] I used to be a movie star, the finest in the land, A hero on the silver screen with six-guns in my hand, But when those bombs came tumbling down in nuclear embrace, Well... let's just say it really REARRANGED my face! (Spoken) "Lost the nose. Kept the charm." My darling wife sold out the world for corporate greed, Vault-Tec turned our paradise into atomic seeds, Now I'm wandering the wasteland as a bounty-hunting ghoul, (Cheerful) But hey, at least I never have to go to dental school! [Chorus - Upbeat, ironic optimism] ♪ Two hundred years and I'm still here! ♪ ♪ No nose, no problem, and no fear! ♪ ♪ They nuked my world and stole my wife, ♪ ♪ But radiation gave me EXTRA life! ♪ ♪ So grab your Rad-Away and Stimpaks too, ♪ ♪ 'Cause Cooper Howard's coming after you! ♪ ♪ Two hundred years of fun and sun, ♪ ♪ Being undead's honestly a TON of fun! ♪ [Verse 2 - Darker, more serious tone] War never changes, that's what they always say, But I've seen empires crumble and turn to ash and clay, My little Janey's somewhere out there in this wasteland hell, And I'll find those Vault-Tec bastards if it takes two centuries more to tell... (Upbeat) But in the MEANTIME, I've got caps to earn! And trigger-happy fingers with a LOT left to learn, I've shot more raiders than I've had hot dinners (which is zero), (Spoken) "Ghouls don't eat much, turns out. Who knew?" I'm a post-apocalyptic ANTI-hero! [Bridge - Mix of serious and absurd] (Haunting) I remember sunshine, laughter, love... Before the mushroom clouds rose high above... (Suddenly cheerful) Now I drink irradiated water from a rusty can! And play poker with a three-armed brahmin named Stan! (Spoken) "Stan cheats." (Serious) They took EVERYTHING I loved and burned it all away, (Upbeat) But I've got TWO HUNDRED YEARS to make 'em pay! ...And honestly? I've got the TIME! ♪ [Verse 3 - Pure Fallout absurdity] I've been shot, stabbed, exploded, and occasionally blown to bits, But radiation keeps me young—well, YOUNGISH—give or take a zit! I've lost my nose, my hair, my wife, my dignity, and pride, But I STILL look better than those ferals on the riverside! (Spoken) "Low bar, I know." I tip my hat to merchants right before I shoot 'em dead, 'Cause MANNERS matter, even when you're putting holes in heads! Some call me a monster, some just call me "Coop," (Cheerful) But most just scream and run away—and sometimes also poop! [Final Chorus - FULL ironic energy] ♪ Two hundred years and I'M STILL HERE! ♪ ♪ The ghoulest cowboy in the stratosphere! ♪ ♪ War never changes? Well that's TRUE, ♪ ♪ But I've got CENTURIES of vengeance overdue! ♪ ♪ So if you see me limping down the dusty trail, ♪ ♪ Just know this cowboy's LONG past his sell-by date but will NOT fail! ♪ ♪ Two hundred years of laughter, tears, and CHEER! ♪ ♪ Cooper Howard's here—now GET ME A BEER! ♪ (Spoken) "Irradiated, preferably." [Outro] (Serious) "War... war never changes..." (Cheerful) "But at least I don't have to worry about skin cancer anymore!" (Revolver shot) (Spoken) "That's showbusiness, baby." _________________ #Fallout #TheGhoul #CooperHoward #WaltonGoggins #FalloutSeries #DarkWestern #WastelandLegends #BountyHunter #PostApocalyptic #Blues #VaultTec #FalloutLore