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This is the most personal video I’ve ever made... but after a year on this healing journey, I'm finally ready to share my story. Over the past year, I’ve uncovered my third diagnosis: Dissociative Amnesia. And with it is the realization that I’ve been living with repressed childhood trauma my entire life. Not because I forgot… but because my brain protected me. Before this, I was already deep into healing. I spent 10 weeks in trauma treatment after being diagnosed with OSDD (a dissociative disorder) and fibromyalgia, which I now understand as my body’s response to a lifetime of dissociation and stored pain. But this new diagnosis reframed everything. It’s why I never remembered my childhood. Why my body feels like it doesn’t belong to me. Why healing has felt like peeling back layers of fog. Starting now, I’m sharing what it’s like to live without your past, how your body can hold memories your mind can’t access, and how I’m finally starting to reconnect with the parts of myself that were hidden for so long. ✰SHADOW BRAINS✰ • Shadow Brains ✰CHAPTERS✰ 0:00 My Third Diagnosis: Dissociative Amnesia & Repressed Trauma 2:45 From Mental Health Spiral to Trauma Treatment Center 6:49 I Was Hurting My Body Trying to Access Repressed Memories 11:11 Realizing My Trauma Lives in My Body and Parts 18:48 Somatic Flashbacks & Grieving the Life I Never Got to Live 23:16 The Truth: I’m Still Afraid to Feel the Memory 25:56 Where I Am Now in My Healing Journey 27:54 What’s Next for My Content and Story ✰ LET’S CONNECT ✰ Instagram ➭ @jacyerin TikTok ➭ @jacyerin_ Vlog Channel ➭ / @jacyhosts ✰TALK SHOW ✰ LIVE Sundays 10am on all platforms ➭ @livestyles.tv Talk Show Replays ➭ / @jacyhosts My Hosting IG & TikTok ➭ @jacyhosts