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Right, picture this: a quiet English village, the kind where nothing much happens except the odd escaped cow or a mildly controversial bake sale. And then—once a year—absolute, glorious chaos. Welcome to the World Custard Pie Championships. Held in Coxheath, Maidstone, this is not some delicate patisserie affair. No, this is a battle. A war zone. A clash of titans armed with pies. Teams don ridiculous costumes, take aim, and launch creamy projectiles at each other with the precision of a guided missile—well, sort of. It all started 54 years ago, originally as a noble effort to raise money for community facilities. But really, who cares about that? The important thing is that since 1964, people have been hurling custard-laden ammunition at their foes in the name of tradition. And frankly, it's probably the best thing to happen to Coxheath since the invention of the pub.