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IN THIS VIDEO: ✨ Why the permission you're waiting for will never come ✨ External vs internal permission: the two traps keeping you stuck ✨ Why your growth makes other people uncomfortable ✨ My story: waiting 25 years for permission I never got ✨ The real reason behind waiting: you're seeking certainty, not permission ✨ How to give yourself permission (the actual practice) ✨ What happens when you choose yourself (including the grief) ✨ Your permission slip: from me to you WHY PEOPLE DONT WANT YOU TO CHANGE: Because your growth requires them to grow too. Your partner would have to face their own fears about change. Your parents would have to question their own life choices. Your friends would have to look at why they're still stuck. Your inner critic would have to admit you're capable. Most people aren't ready to face that. So they keep you waiting. Not because they're bad people. Not because they don't love you. Because your comfort is easier for them than their discomfort. They're protecting themselves. Not you. HOW TO GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION: First: Recognize what you're really waiting for. You think it's permission. But it's actually certainty. You want someone to promise: "This will work out. You won't fail." But no one can promise that. Stop waiting for certainty. Choose anyway. Second: Get clear about whose permission you're seeking. Whose approval do you need? Parents? Partner? Friends? Society? Inner critic? Perfect future self? Write them down. Then ask honestly: "Will this person ever give me permission to outgrow them?" Usually? No. Third: Reclaim your power. Say this out loud: "I give myself permission to want what I want—even if no one understands it." "I give myself permission to grow—even if it makes people uncomfortable." "I give myself permission to choose me—even when it disappoints others." "I give myself permission to try and fail and try again." "I give myself permission to trust my inner coach more than anyone else's opinion." "I give myself permission to build a life that feels like mine—not theirs." This isn't one-time. This is daily practice. Every day, you choose: self-permission or self-abandonment? Your growth or their comfort? Choose yourself. Again and again. THE HARD PART: When you give yourself permission to grow, some people will leave. Not because you're doing anything wrong. But because your growth forces them to look at their own stuckness. If they're not ready to grow with you, they'll choose their comfort over your relationship. It's painful. It's real. It's grief. And it's also okay. The people who belong in your life will celebrate your growth—not resist it. Those are your people. The ones who say "I see you changing and it's beautiful." The rest? Companions for a season. And that season is over. Grieve it. But don't let it stop you from growing. YOUR PERMISSION SLIP: You've been waiting for permission that's never coming. The people you're seeking it from are scared. Scared of your growth. Scared of change. Their fear is not your responsibility. You can love them. Hold space for their discomfort. But you cannot abandon yourself to keep them comfortable. So here's your permission slip. Right now. From me to you: You are allowed to want more. You are allowed to choose yourself. You are allowed to set boundaries, disappoint people, try and fail. You are allowed to grow even when it's uncomfortable. You are allowed to trust yourself more than you trust their fears about you. You don't need anyone's approval to become who you're meant to be. Not your parents'. Not your partner's. Not society's. Not your inner critic's. You just need yours. And that? That's the bravest thing you'll ever do. This is Day 10 of The Change Code: Week 2 continues. ABOUT ME: I'm Jodie Bowen, creator of The Change Code™ framework, author of The Change Code book (coming soon), and transformation coach. I've spent 25 years leading change for Fortune 500 companies and helping over 100,000 people navigate transformation. Now I'm sharing what I've learned to help make change easier. FREE RESOURCES: 💌 Join my email community: https://linktr.ee/thechangecode 📱 Instagram: / the.change.code 📱 TikTok: / thechangecode 🎁 Download 30 Nervous System Tools: https://linktr.ee/thechangecode 👇 Website: https://www.thechangecode.co.uk/ Change is constant, so why not get good at it? See you tomorrow for Day 11. ✨ #SelfPermission #ChooseYourself #SetBoundaries