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In this episode of The Estrange Heart Podcast, Kreed discusses the often misunderstood concept of 'owning your shit.' She emphasizes that this is not merely a moral virtue but rather a matter of emotional and relational capacity. Kreed explores the dynamics of accountability, identity threat, and shame, particularly in parent-child relationships. She highlights the importance of understanding one's capacity to engage in accountability and the potential harm of pushing for apologies without readiness. The conversation also delves into the significance of setting boundaries with compassion and the true essence of ownership in healing relationships. Takeaways • Owning your shit is about capacity, not morality. • Identity threat can lead to existential crises for parents. • Shame activation can shut down communication and reflection. • Pushing for accountability without capacity can cause more harm. • Maturity in relationships means understanding one's limits. • The goal is to avoid adding harm in the name of truth. www.TheEstrangedHeart.com (http://www.theestrangedheart.com) Email: hello@TheEstrangedHeart.com (mailto:hello@TheEstrangedHeart.com) Work with Kreed: https://theestrangedheart.com/services (private coaching, mediation, support groups, webinars, etc.) The Heart Collective: https://theestrangedheart.com/membership Facebook Support Group for Estranged Moms (facilitated by Kreed) / estrangedmotherssupportgroup To support the podcast and Kreed’s work with estranged and reconciled parents and adult children: https://buymeacoffee.com/kreedrevere