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compliance-defiance

Detecting and working with patients who comply with others and then, as they build up resentment about unmet needs that are never expressed, go to a defiant position. These character defenses create and perpetuate the patients suffering. If you only address the symptoms and not the processes that reinforce them, no lasting change will occur. Many therapists fall into the trap of taking over when their patients present in a passive, helpless, and subservient position. This only reinforces the pathological mode of relating to self and other. It is essential to highlight the pattern and interrupt it - not by demanding (which make compliance-defince the only option) but putting the choice in their lap.