Common Ground Conversations | Ep 28: How To Speak Up Without Losing Yourself скачать в хорошем качестве

Common Ground Conversations | Ep 28: How To Speak Up Without Losing Yourself

It’s a few days before Christmas, and Dr. JoNeil Conley and Dr. Bonnie Nussbaum sit down for a real-life conversation about one of the hardest parts of the holidays (and honestly… life): navigating people. Family. Co-workers. Church groups. Community spaces. Anyone who can push a button. This episode explores the tension between keeping the peace and maintaining personal integrity—especially when harmful comments, power dynamics, or long-standing patterns show up. You’ll leave with practical ways to pause, regulate, choose your response, and decide when it’s worth engaging (and when it’s not). What We Cover: -Why the holidays can feel like a never-ending churn of “people-ing” -The “erosion” in our collective ability to disagree with kindness and respect -The difference between reaction and response (and why it matters) -A timely discussion on Mel Robbins’ “Let Them” theory + the backlash around “peace at any cost” -The real-life dilemma: personal peace vs. ethical responsibility -“Uncle Albert” dynamics: the person who provokes (on purpose or by accident) — and why you likely won’t change them -Amygdala hijack: what happens in your brain/body when you get triggered (and why it happens fast) -The value of “buying time”: bathroom breaks, dog walks, stepping outside, grabbing the mashed potatoes -How to discern when you need to say something—especially when silence could feel like approval A simple boundary phrase for heated situations: “I heartily disagree. We’re not going to change each other’s minds. Let’s shift topics.” -The hidden cost of “going along to get along” (your body doesn’t like feeling sold out) -Practical follow-up language when you think of the “right thing” later: “Let me get back to you on that.” / “What I really wanted to say was…” Key Takeaways: -Do the mental math: What will it cost you to engage? What will it cost you not to? -You can’t think your way out of activation—you have to tool your way out. -Taking the pause is almost never regretted. Spewing usually is. -Integrity doesn’t always mean calling it out publicly. Sometimes it means choosing the right time, place, and method. -Build awareness of your soft spots—your tender places—so you can respond with intention. Try This: -Before your next gathering, meeting, or tough conversation, ask yourself: -What topics/phrases trigger my “soft spots”? -What will help me regulate quickly if I feel activated? (breath, feet on the floor, stepping away) -When I walk away, what would I need to have done to feel in integrity? Mentioned in This Episode -Mel Robbins’ “Let Them” theory (and the debate around “peace at any cost”) -Nervous system regulation tools (pause, breath, grounding, tapping, stepping away) Stay Connected / Work With Us Connect with Bonnie: YouTube: @bonnienussbaum8048 Facebook: Dr. Bonnie Nussbaum, Empowerment Coaching Instagram: @empowermentandpurpose LinkedIn: Dr. Bonnie Nussbaum empowermentandpurpose.com Book a FREE Discovery Call: https://drbonnienussbaum.as.me/schedu...[]=9198914 Connect with JoNeil: YouTube: @joneilconley8132 TikTok: @joneilsmithconley Facebook: Dr. JoNeil Instagram: @drjoneil drjoneil.com Book a FREE Overwhelm Recovery Call: https://calendly.com/drjoneil/overwhe...